We love to chat. We have an average of 30 conversations a day. 1/5 of our life we ​​talk. In a year, your conversations would amount to 66 books of 800 pages. Men pronounce 20 thousand words a day, women - 30 thousand.

Nothing opens out of time like our mouth. It produces a lot of problems. But when it is necessary (to testify), he does not want to open up. Whoever masters the language becomes a mature person. “For we all sin a lot. He who does not sin in word is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body. " (James 3: 2)

Why watch your words?

1. Language guides my life. My words become my destiny. "All things are determined by the word, have the basis of the word, originated from the word, who is dishonest in speech, dishonest in everything." (Hinduism. Laws of Manu 4.256) Examples:

• The habit of hurting others condemns to a life of conflict.
• Constant complaints and accusations of others lead to irresponsibility, and, consequently, to futility in business.
• Swearing reliably protects you from the appearance of decent people in your environment.
• If you are grossly materialistic in your language, no one will fight for ideals with you.
• If you speak in slogans, you will be surrounded by stupid people.
• Those who inspire others have a more positive perception of reality themselves. They can do more, enjoy authority with other people.
• Those who speak sincerely will meet sincere people.
• Speakers of the truth will meet direct, open and courageous people who love the truth.

2. In one word, you can destroy everything that you have collected all your life. One extra word can deprive you of a friend. The wrong word can kill a spiritual child, destroy a team, cause a collapse in a person's heart. One word can resurrect, encourage, save a person's life. The whole scandal starts with one word. One word can trigger divorce. One word can restore a relationship. The word can turn history.

The Holy Instructor lit a lamp with the Word,
And the darkness was defeated in the temple of human selfhood
And the precious chamber was opened.
And we were amazed contemplating this greatness
Greatness beyond description.
(Sikhism. Adi-Granth, Bilawal M. 5)

"But he answered and said to him: It is written: Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God." (Matthew 4: 6)

3. My tongue shows everyone who I am... And I am a rather contradictory person. "With it we bless God and the Father, and with it we curse people who were created in the likeness of God." (James 3: 9) In an instant I praise God, and in a minute I shout: "Shut up!" Glorifying God is the highest purpose of language. The second purpose is to bear witness to the Truth. Why can we be so affectionate to children, and immediately rude to them? The tongue shows the heart. I can pretend for a while, and then my tongue will give me away. Whoever speaks harshly has an evil heart. Whoever sees problems everywhere has fear in his heart. Those who talk a lot have a restless heart. Whoever criticizes everyone has a grudge in his heart. Conversely, someone who speaks softly has a loving heart. Speakers of the truth have a sincere heart.

How to control the tongue?

1. A new heart. Where can I get it? True Parents. Being born again through the Blessing means finding a new heart. A revolution of truth, a revolution of conscience and a revolution of the heart. The heart revolution is the most important revolution in human history. With problems in our organization, we lost our hearts. It is now important to connect with Moon Hyung Jin's spirit and find the heart again. The essence of the new heart is the heart of salvation. Such a heart cannot be silent about the fact that there is a Principle, that there are True Parents. If we are truly connected with God, organizational issues should not worry us too much. Of course, we look back to see with whom we will build the Country of universal peace and unity, but if we depend on their decision, then it is no longer ours anyway. It is necessary to make decisions without looking back at others, and then only look who is with you and who is not with you and what can be done to make him there. Testifying to the truth begins with oneself. I cannot testify, mainly because I myself am not sure, I have doubts, bitterness, resentment and unfulfilled dreams in my very heart. You don't have to testify. Okay, let's say God accepts it. But what about your heart? How does it feel to carry it all in yourself? Do I want this?

2. Ask God for help. It takes supernatural strength to control yourself. So simple, by itself, it will be very difficult to do it. The presence of the Spirit of God is not about speaking in unknown tongues, but about controlling your tongue. To emit the Divine, you need to receive more of the Divine. What goes around comes around. One must admit the Word of God (hundokhwe tradition). "Lay, O Lord, a guard for my mouth, and protect the doors of my mouth." (Psalm 140: 3)

3. Think, then speak. You need to listen more. Don't rush to say. This is an important rule. If you listen more, you will not speak hastily, which means you will not be hastily angry. “So, my beloved brethren, let everyone be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. By me I swear: from my mouth comes the truth, the unchanging word, that every knee will bow before me, every tongue will swear by me. " (Judaism and Christianity. Isaiah 45: 22-23)

Everyone must have heard the expression My tongue is my enemy... And it is true. Sometimes we happen to say things that later we bitterly regret. We get angry with our own language and think about how to curb it. In the series of classes "My language ..." we will talk about how to stop fighting with your own language, how to turn it into your best friend, how to find a common language with different people regardless of gender and temperament.

"The word spoken from the heart goes straight to the heart."

Lesson 1. How to make friends with your own language.

Today we will deal with the nature of the language. To begin with, let's remember Chekhov's "Chameleon". The circumstances are quite curious - a certain dog bit the foreman's finger (he poked her with a burning cigar in the nose), and they do not change, the situational coloring of the circumstances changes (the dog can be either not clear whose, or the general's). Well, what about the poor police warden Ochumelov?

Hm! .. Okay ... - says Ochumelov sternly, coughing and moving his eyebrows. - Okay ... Whose dog? I won't leave it like that. I'll show you how to disband dogs! It's time to pay attention to such gentlemen who do not want to obey the decrees! As I fine him, the bastard, he will learn from me what a dog and other stray cattle mean! I'll show him Kuzka's mother! .. Eldyrin, - the warden turns to the policeman, - find out whose dog it is, and draw up a protocol! And the dog must be exterminated. Don't hesitate! She's probably mad ... Whose dog is this, I ask?

It seems to be General Zhigalov! - says someone from the crowd.

General Zhigalov? Hm! .. Take off, Eldyrin, my coat ... It's terrible, how hot it is! I suppose before the rain ... There is only one thing I do not understand: how could she bite you? - Ochumelov turns to Khryukin. - Can't she reach her finger? She is small, and you were so healthy! You must have poked your finger open with a nail, and then an idea came into your head to rip it off. You are ... famous people! I know you devils!

My tongue is my enemy! Right, oh, how right Martin Luther was when he said, "To find out which fruit is on a tree, you need to shake it." In moments of turmoil, language is a particularly clear barometer. Stop stop stop !!! From this place in more detail ... What barometer, what are we talking about?

OK. Let's go in order.

So, the principle of the language. The best and most detailed description of it is in the Epistle of the Apostle James. I will not give the entire Bible text - anyone can open the Bible and read it (James 3: 1-12). But I advise you to pay close attention to the eighth verse: "and none of the people can tame the language: this is an irrepressible evil." Blimey! That's great news! Since this activity is impossible (Jacob says twice about this), therefore, it is worth stopping to engage in useless business, because repeating the same actions with the hope of a different result is a sign of insanity. Take a deep breath and feel good - no need to fight with your tongue! Due to inappropriate actions.

Jacob cites horses and ships as examples, but we will not analyze these examples, because most people have little idea of ​​how to steer ships and horses. Therefore, we will transfer everything to more modern rails. KAMAZ! Great example! A modern Jacob would say: "KAMAZ is a very heavy car, it is impossible to stop or try to hold it. But KAMAZ is not independent! Its behavior on the roads depends on the driver. will not cause harm, but if a drunk maniac is driving ... All hove! ".

Gold words! And why does no one read them literally, as well as other words of the same Jacob: "Does sweet and bitter water flow from one source?"

Let's deal with the sources. First, what is the source. As a geologist, I would say that this is a natural outlet for groundwater on the earth's surface. Those., what is inside under pressure pours out as soon as it finds a suitable hole. Or a suitable occasion.

In other words, trying to curb the tongue - we are, as it were, trying to plug a hole in the earth's crust. Meaning? What is inside under pressure will find another reason to come out. Hence, it makes sense to pay attention to what is under pressure. Sweet or bitter water?

The question, therefore, rests against replacing the internal content or state, as it is more convenient for you. And the language? And the language is not the enemy, it is just the voice acting of what is inside.

It's simple - do not fight with the language, it is better to take care of your brains, your perception of the world, your relationship with God, finally.

After all, words are secondary to thoughts. And man himself is what his thoughts are. And all our failures and misfortunes are nothing more than a signal that we are in disharmony with the world around us, and the reason for this is negative or just useless thoughts wandering in our mind... And if we want to change our life for the better, then we must first change our thinking. By changing our thinking, we will change ourselves, and as a result, the world around us..

What do we have to do? Listen to wise people:

1. Apostle Paul "Finally, my brothers, what is only true, what is honest, what is just, what is dear, what is glorious, think about this"
2. Moses "Beware lest a wicked thought enter into your heart"
3. Yogis Beware of incontinence in thought. Watch your thoughts strictly. Rejecting all evil in thoughts, strive with pure thought for perfection "
4. I don’t know who, but very correctly confirmed: Watch your thoughts, they become your words. Watch your words as they go into. Watch your habits, they shape your character. Watch your character, for it determines your destiny "
5. Marcus Aurelius "Our life is what our thoughts make it"

How can this be put into practice?

One of the most difficult challenges a person faces is controlling their tongue. Sins are also committed with the language - this is backbiting, gossip, lies, hurtful words ... Probably everyone knows when, in a fit of anger or anger, we say and shout out the first thing that comes to mind, and then we bitterly regret it. Can this be avoided somehow? How not to be a victim of your words? How to protect yourself from this?

Think before you say something. As difficult as it may seem, especially when emotions get the better of you. The surest way to protect yourself from the dire consequences of your words is to think before you speak. We are used to saying without thinking that words have lost at least any value and are flying out of us to the right and left without much significance.

Imagine that for every thoughtless and spoken word by you, you will have to bear punishment. Just for yourself, imagine that it will hurt you if you say something offensive to another person, it will make you think before you speak.

2. Ask for forgiveness

As difficult as it may seem, if you brought pain in your own words to another person, just ask for forgiveness. Even if this person has hurt you, offended you, or in your opinion deserves it, do not be the one who answers evil for evil. There is nothing good about it. Our religion calls for restraint, humility and patience in all situations. In addition, the very asking for forgiveness will force you to show restraint in advance the next time, so as not to ask for forgiveness later.

3. Surround yourself with good people

If you find yourself prone to gossip and discussion because of your surroundings, change it. Surround yourself with good people who see only good in people and will teach you this. Good friends cultivate only the best in us and force us to abandon bad habits.

4. Make a reminder

Gossip, lies are all sins committed by the tongue and are forbidden in Islam. This is stated both in the Qur'an and in the hadiths of the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him). Study this topic in the hadith, the Qur'an, make a reminder for yourself, study the punishment that follows for committing this kind of sins. Just visualize these punishments for yourself and make these sins something very scary for yourself. Remember the angels, who every second write down your every deed and word ...

5. Reward yourself

Every time you can restrain yourself or remain silent, when you could say something offensive and bad, encourage yourself with some kind of gift, praise yourself for what you did as you should!

Priest John Pavlov

16.On the sins of language and word

There is one place in the New Testament where the apostle James discusses the sins of the word. It says that the tongue, although a small member in the human body, often does a lot of evil. The language is called by the Apostle a fire kindled from Gehenna, an embellishment of untruth and an evil filled with a deadly poison, which no one can tame to the end. From these words it is clearly seen, brothers and sisters, how serious the sins of our tongue are. And this is not surprising at all: after all, the gift of the word is one of God's highest gifts to man, and therefore the sins that pervert this gift are very bad sins.

Man is a verbal creature, in contrast to dumb animals. Even the very name "man" is derived by some from the word "words" - that is, a verbal being. But the main thing is not even this, but the fact that our God and Creator is God the Word. "Word" is one of the names of God. “In the beginning was the Word,” we read in the Gospel. And for this reason, the sins of the tongue and the word are grave sins, for they relate personally to Him, to the hypostatic Word, to the second Person of the Trinity.

The gift of the word is a mysterious gift, and we know that the word can have great power. Our very universe, as you know, was created by the word of God. “The heavens were created by the word of the Lord,” says the king and psalmist David. And this gift of the word, given to us, we can use both for good and for evil. God gave it to man to use for good. But alas, very often we use it for evil. And of course, the devil always tries to persuade us to do this, who knows very well that the sins of a word are very dangerous and fatal for a person. What are these sins? Let's try to briefly list the main ones.

The first such sin is idle talk. Idle talk is when we talk a lot about nothing, wasting the gift of speech on vanity and emptiness. People sin with this sin all the time, they are ready to idle with anyone and anywhere - whether at home, at work, at a party, or, for example, in a church. Many are able to talk on the phone for hours. It is quite obvious that most of such conversations refer specifically to idle talk, for these are conversations in the literal sense of nothing, according to the popular proverb: he speaks all day until evening, but there is nothing to listen to. However, the divine gift of the word is too great to waste it thoughtlessly, aimlessly and meaninglessly. This waste of aimlessness is a sin. In the Gospel, Christ says that for every idle word at the last Judgment, people will give an answer. How are we going to be responsible for our idle words? After all, we will have whole seas or oceans with such words?

In addition, idle talk has an extremely detrimental effect on a person's spiritual life. It empties the soul and expels the Grace of God from it. The Holy Fathers gave the following comparison: if the door is often opened in a heated bath, the heat quickly disappears. So it happens with us: Grace comes into the soul, for example, through prayer or Communion, but we, indulging in idle talk, quickly blur it out, and the soul again becomes empty ...

If the sins of words were limited to idle talk alone, it would be half the trouble. However, idle talk is followed and easily mixed with a number of other sins, and often grave sins. Such, for example, as condemnation. Indeed, very often it is precisely this that is the main topic of our conversations. We are used to condemning everyone and everything: relatives, neighbors, bosses, colleagues, politicians and anyone else. Meanwhile, many holy fathers, for example the Monk Ambrose of Optina, say that of all the commandments of the Gospel, the commandment “do not judge” is the most important. Condemnation is hateful to God; it is like a denunciation of one's neighbor. When we condemn, we accuse this or that person before God, we denounce him. And by this we become like the devil, about whom it is said in the Scriptures that he slanders people before God day and night, that is, he is an informer. The Lord gave us a commandment that we love one another, and we, instead, condemn and inform Him against each other. Moreover, almost always these denunciations are false, for the simple reason that our court about a person in most cases is erroneous, incorrect.

Verbal sins do not end with condemnation. The sin of condemnation easily turns into outright backbiting, and then we begin to insult, call names and scold people with expletive words, forgetting that for all this we are threatened in the literal sense of Gehenna. For it is written in the Gospel: whoever says to his brother: "cancer" is subject to the Sanhedrin; and whoever says, "foolish," is subject to fiery hell. It happens that in a fit of anger, a person comes to the point where he curses other people, and sometimes even the closest ones. Cursing is a terrible thing, especially when parents curse their children. Such a curse can have an effect, the enemy can, as it were, catch the insane word of a father or mother and through it gain the right and access to a person for his activity, which always brings evil and destruction with it. Alas, there are many examples from life that confirm the truth of what was said.

The next, also very common sin of the tongue, is foul language. Who is forcing you to use foul language, O man? Can't you speak humanly, without vile obscene words and expressions? And after all, people often use foul language for no apparent reason, not even for a catchphrase, but just like that, out of a bad, brainless habit. Do I need to say that foul language and swearing are a grave sin? After all, even if it will not be easy for us to answer before God for an idle word, how will we answer for nasty and obscene words?

Another of the sins of the language should be mentioned the sins of lies and hypocrisy. Like the sin of condemnation, lies and hypocrisy are also in their essence the most devilish sins, for these qualities are deeply inherent in the devil, who is called the father of lies in the Gospel. He is also the father of hypocrisy, because, as an angel of darkness, he always takes the form of an Angel of light. And the person who is accustomed to lying and hypocrisy should know that by this he became like the devil and became akin to him.

So, we have briefly enumerated the sins of the tongue. As you can see, there are indeed many bad and grave sins among them. Let us say again: the word is a great gift from God, and any great gift, depending on how you use it, can become the cause of both great good and great evil. Here is the word - it can create, and it can destroy, it can heal, and it can kill, it can bring a blessing, or it can curse. Let us always remember this, brothers and sisters, let us be very careful and careful in how we use the word. Let us try to curb our tongue and prevent, as far as possible, the commission of the sins that we have spoken about. Of course, curbing your tongue can be very difficult, and the Apostle James says bluntly that this work belongs to the perfect. But we are precisely called to Christian perfection, called by our Lord and Creator Himself. Therefore, if we work hard and make efforts, then the Lord will help us, and little by little we will learn to use the gift of the word as it should be used - for good and for salvation. Amen.